On-The-Border-Line

Today I will be talking about intense and unstable relationships when it comes to BPD. This is the second post about this topic and this time it has to do with friends.   I’ve had lots of different friends come and go throughout the years. For some people with BPD, we might have a “favorite” person. One person that we would prefer to spend all of our time with and latch on to them and kind of suffocate them with how attached we are. With my childhood, it was always a friend. When I got into my late teens and young adulthood, it became my significant other (when I had one). I will talk more about my relationships with significant others in a separate post.   I usually had a best friend every year of school. It was almost always someone different just based on who was in my classroom. I never had more than one best friend. Life was so great whenever they were around and when they were absent from school, life was difficult. I got jealous whenever they w...

MARCH 2 — 10 On Friday, March 2nd, I got to dress up like a princess since it was Dress Like Your Favorite Storybook Character Day. That is one reason why I like my job, is that I get to do fun days like that. I’ve also thought a lot about creating a vlog. I gathered a lot of music to use for it. I’m still going back and forth on how I actually want to do it. I’ll keep you updated as time goes on. On Saturday, March 3rd, my first rehearsal was for the Rose Adagio, which is just basically cleaning it up because it’s been finished for a while. Then I had rehearsal for Little Red Riding Hood, which I don’t dance a lot in that one. The prince and I mostly just sat and watched. I got a lot accomplished, I managed to finish a video and a blog post. Then I just became a slug as soon as I finished those things. That night I went to Salvage BBQ with Gerry. The moment I walked in, I felt so anxious. I didn’t want to dance because I hadn’t done any swing dancing in a really long...

Hey guys, today I will be talking about a few of my favorites that I have been loving recently. I’ll do these from time to time, but not very often since my favorites don’t really change that often. The first item is my Aura Cacia Room & Body Mist in the scent Relaxing Lavender. This is a spray that you can use as a body mist or a room freshener. I only use it as a room freshener and I’ve been loving the smell of lavender lately. It helps me feel relaxed. I think I got this on Amazon for about $8.   The second item is my Conair Fashion Curl hair curler. This is one of those hair curlers where it sucks in your hair, holds it for a few seconds, and you have a curl. There are two temperature settings, low for looser curls, and high for tighter curls. I love how easy it is to curl your hair and how technology has just greatly improved over time. The best part is, I got a great deal on it. Full price it was normally $75. I got it for $7. That’s a s...

Hi everyone. For the next several posts, I’m going to be talking about having unstable relationships. I will be talking about unstable relationships in three parts: family, friends, and significant others. Today I will talking specifically about family.   One characteristic of having Borderline Personality Disorder is having a pattern of intense and unstable relationships that swing from idealization to devaluation. Basically swinging from “the best person in the world” to “the worst person in the world” with very little in between. This makes it hard for both the person with BPD and the person who has a relationship towards the person with BPD.   As far as my own relationship with my family, it has mostly been on the devaluation side. I didn’t really swing a whole heck of a lot between my family members because most of the time, they were very strict and I resented them for that. Family was definitely important to me, but they were never my top priority i...

FEBRUARY 9 — FEBRUARY 17 On Friday, February 9th, I discovered a new app called HQ Trivia. It’s a live game show that takes place twice a day and lasts for about 20 minutes. If you get all 12 questions correct, you split a cash prize. I played for the first time that night and made it to question number 7. I’m sure at some point, I’ll get all 12 questions correct.   On Saturday, February 10th I had my first two rehearsals of Sleeping Beauty. My first rehearsal was basically a lifting workshop where my partner and I were experimenting with different lifts that we could do during our duet. The next rehearsal was for the Rose Adagio, which is where Aurora dances with four potential suitors. I had a lot of fun with that dance. Later that night, Emma and I went to see a trans-gender talent show fundraiser thing. A few of our friends were in it, so we decided to go watch. The talent ranged from poems to songs to skits to dancing. Emma and I ended up leaving early t...